This might be kind of triggering for some, for talk of self harm.
When it hurts on the inside, so bad, and you want it to hurt on the outside. You want to punish yourself for being so fucking shit and so fucking useless. It just hurts and hurts and it never stops. Something inside says that if you make the pain real on the outside, it might let it out.
You’re sure everyone you know hates you, and you know that if you try to ask them about that, it might come true. When does it come when you’ve taken so much from someone that they turn away from you?
When there are people everywhere, but you’re still alone.
When you believe the only emotion you’re worthy of is hatred. That everything you do or have ever done is without merit.
You still have to get up in the morning though. You still have to go to work. You still have to pretend you’re happy and everything is good, and none of them will ever know or care how you feel inside.
